just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
Okay, this next statement may sound like a red flag but I'm tellin you, shotgunning those two beers really helped me love my child more effectively. Honest.
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