Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
A homeless man just asked me if I had seen any "nekkid chicks with heineken bottles run by"
Berkeley was the right choice
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
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