That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
We were drunk waiting for tacos and I gave him a handy in the back of the Uber while giving the driver relationship advice. I think I'm handling the whole grad school thing alright.
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
Randomize
