we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
Oh, btw, UPS might come by. Drunk me ordered us $75 worth of gummy airhead starburst type candies. Whatever it is, it'll be delicious.
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
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