return my video game
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
When she e-mailed me back asking for proof, complete with hospital intake records, I just told her it was a home-birth. I'm prepared to take the fail.
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
Sorry didnt text you yesterday. had to put restraining order on my ex.
Randomize
