u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
I'm gonna fight the coyote
Randomize