With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
Better skin, bigger boobs.. Birth control is INCREASING my chance of getting pregnant because people actually want to have sex with me now.
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
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