At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
Need help. Super baked. Stuck on couch. Dying of thirst. Bring paint thinner or something to pry me off. Only thumbs and neck work.
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
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