A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
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