Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
I drank a fishbowl of liquor and next thing I know I'm sliding into Zach Galifinakis' DMs
Randomize
