i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
Got everyone out of my house, somehow managed to put all my lawn furniture back, puked in my sink, and cleaned it up all while black out drunk before my parents came home. Successful night.
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
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