Did you REALLY have to twitter about our sex last night?
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
Randomize
