it hurts more in the daytime
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
I'm more picky about my flip flops than the guys I sleep with
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
We were so hungover we fell asleep in Goodyear waiting for them to fix her car. At 4 in the afternoon on a Sunday. The workers apparently didnt want to vacuum because they didn't want to wake us.
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
Randomize
