well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
I want her autograph on my taint
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
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