Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
You layed on my kitchen floor with a pile of m&ms at your crotch, said "your lightbulb don't match, is that one new?"
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
I woke up this morning half naked, smelling like an ash tray, with an empty bottle of jack next to me, and now someone named Dora the anal explorer is texting me.
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
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