do you know why i have a volvo grill taped to the back of my car?
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
I'm not even planning on drinking that much tonight.. but I'm writing "emergency contact number" and your number on my hand just in case
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
I need to wash the frat house off of me
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
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