I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
what are we doing this weekend?
I have enough booze to get us through Armageddon...which basically means that on Sunday we will have to make a trip to the liquor store.
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
Randomize
