i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
No he's great. He's trying to do "sexy stuff" for me now, which is pretty hilarious. He stirred my daiquiri with his penis last night. He also tied a bouquet of flowers around it.
Stop calling dibs on everything with a vagina you jackass.
That should be the title of my autobiography.
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
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