the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
i think the date started going downhill when i mentioned how many therapists i have
He keeps trying to sell me the forks from his kitchen drawer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
Randomize