How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
Randomize