Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
I’m so poor I’m filling a flask with vodka and bringing it to the bar.
Randomize