That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
he looked at me and said 'happiness is a warm blanket' then stole my vodka.
... Okay, fine. But I don't want to be a better person tonight. I'll be a better person tomorrow.
Randomize
