I may or may not have started my period at the bar. Good thing I have dark jeans on.
why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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