Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
Do you think it would be weird to wear a shirt that says 'big fun small package' from an ex for a first date?
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
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