I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
Randomize
