I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
HE HAS A FUCKING TWIN. HE HAS A TWIN. I'M NOT DRUNK THERE IS TWO OF THEM.
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
Randomize
