I think im going to throw up on grandma
I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
Randomize
