One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The ice cream man just told me to use protection.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
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