do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
You kept hiding marshmallows in the freezer saying "they would never think to look here"
I was just about to send a concerned text until I opened my door and saw a shopping cart. I'm glad you made it home in one piece and with toys.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
Brandon's Recipe: two parts cocoa, one part sugar, one part milk, two parts four, 378 parts paranoia. Thanks for the fucking brownies, bitch.
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
I would ride that face into the sunset
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
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