How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
If I get laid tonight it will 1.) Prove that the sex gods do in fact exist, and 2.) Show that I am one motherfucking badass bitch.
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize
