the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
I know i'm drunk when the "men" sign on the bathroom sounds chinese
found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
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