doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
This girl I work with, who is 18 btw, invited me to her baby shower. Do they sell abortions in gift certificate form?
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
Randomize
