My 12 y/o god son's bandmate just asked me to their school dance. Still he's a better catch than the last one...
last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
Please tell me you werent the one who replaced every beer bottle in my fridge with a picture of a baby kitten.
... and if i was..
Fuck. You.
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
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