there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
Randomize
