His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
Randomize
