I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
Dude true life I died at the derby...I lost everyone I knew, went down a bourbon and mud slip and slide, lost my hat, fell off the roof of a porta potty, sprained my ankle and knee and then got arrested.
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
Randomize
