So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
Randomize
