are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
I folded my dollar bills into mustaches in preparation for our trip to the strip club
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
Randomize
