I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
Randomize
