I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
My plan to hit on all your friends went to shit after the 3rd dirty martini.
Randomize