so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
bras are like tupperware for tits, keeps em fresh.
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
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