Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
this isnt the person you just texted but i have her phone. she disappeared when the bacon came home and she hasn't returned since.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
Don't worry, your car is safe with me. I am throwing watermelons out of it at mailboxes and hipster kids.
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
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