ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I swear, you have an app for that. "Attention: your boyfriend is pooping. Place call?"
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
I told her you were a premature ejaculator. She nodded and said "Really? Wow, how long's he been a Pilot for?"
you are both the best and worst wingman ever.
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
Randomize