Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
I just changed all my morning alarms to wake me up with different Jesse McCartney songs telling me I'm beautiful. Would you believe I'll be 25 this year?
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
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