Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
im drinking this country out of the recession.
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
Randomize
