giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
Randomize
