The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
Upon further investigation it turns out it wasn't blood, but chocolate frosting from the cupcake I shoved in my pocket to "save for later"
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
