It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
Getting cock-blocked by Jeff Bridges. NOT OKAY.
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
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