i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
You know what's worse than asking for the morning after pill? Asking for the morning after pill in a sketchy hospital in a foreign country where no one speaks English.
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
Randomize
