how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
She needs sedatives and a leash
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
An "unreasonable amount of ejaculate" isn't a reason to be angry at me.
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Randomize
