He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
your room smells of hookers.
And success
apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst?
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
Randomize
